Wildly Kind is on a mission to spread acts of kindness to strangers, not only in its home base of Portland but also across the nation and around the world. The Portland Tribune recently profiled the three-year-old nonprofit and the national media attention it received for a pop-up event it held in February, which involved setting up a phone booth for people to record anonymous messages of hope and encouragement for others to hear.
Executive Director and Founder Kayla Lamoreaux says Wildly Kind grew out of a desire to affirm and maintain her sobriety from alcohol through fostering “a community of kindness” by handing out flowers or self-care kits or paying for a stranger’s groceries at the check-out line.
Wildly Kind has now grown to include volunteers, corporate sponsors and more than 100 “ambassadors” who perform acts of kindness in more than 20 states and six countries. Ambassadors pay $20 a month to receive a branded t-shirt, a monthly newsletter with ideas for spreading kindness, priority sign-ups for pop-up events and other perks.
Lamoreux joins us to share more details about Wildly Kind and its unique nonprofit model.
Note: The following transcript was transcribed digitally and validated for accuracy, readability and formatting by an OPB volunteer.
Dave Miller: This is Think Out Loud on OPB. I’m Dave Miller. We end today with the Portland nonprofit Wildly Kind. Its mission is pretty close to its name, to encourage people to be wildly kind to one another. Kayla Lamoreaux started it three years ago. The group received national attention not that long ago for its pop-up event in February. That involved a phone booth where people could record anonymous messages of hope and encouragement for other folks to hear. Kayla Lamoreaux joins us now. It’s great to have you on the show.
Kayla Lamoreaux: Thank you. I’m so excited to be here.
Miller: What was the spark for starting this?
Lamoreaux: So I got sober in August of 2020. I was always someone who really leaned into the social scene and partying. I used alcohol as that social lubrication to meet friends, really to do anything that I was doing. And then the pandemic hit. I was at home all day and my alcohol abuse really started to spiral then. I was kind of faced with that decision, as were many others, in August. And I decided to go one way and I got sober.
And full transparency, that first year following this newly found sobriety I was expecting this just beautiful uplifting life. And I found myself really in an identity crisis. I was like “how do I show up in the world when I’m not the party girl and not in the party scene?” Really, going out and doing acts of kindness just became a coping skill to get me out of that depression. My now husband, we were just dating at the time, and he kind of suggested “let’s go out, let’s pay it forward into the community.” So instead of going out and drinking and going to happy hours on the weekends, I would stay at home and make care packages for the unhoused community. We would start taking the funds that I would spend on alcohol every week and I would go do an act of kindness instead.
Miller: It seems – self-serving is not the right word – but it was like there was something you were getting, that was really helping you from helping others. Is that a fair way to put it?
Lamoreaux: Totally. It’s so interesting because in those first couple months of sobriety, I kept saying “I don’t think I’ll ever be as happy.” Like I was so happy drinking and partying. I really was happy in that scene, I did it well. And I just didn’t know if there was ever going to be that level of happiness or fun found in this sobriety that I was now living in, this new reality. And when I went out and performed an act of kindness, I felt that same dopamine rush. I felt the serotonin. I got a hit. And I kind of knew immediately the first time I went and paid for someone’s groceries, aside from the organization, it wasn’t an actual organization, I was just going out on my own. And she was emotional and I just knew immediately this is it, this is the thing that’s going to get me out of this funk that I’m in.
Miller: You paid for someone’s groceries. So, what was the scene?
Lamoreaux: Yeah, this was pretty early on. Like I said, I was just at a Safeway in our neighborhood and paid for a woman’s groceries. And she was very shocked. Again, I think a reason for this organization is to help with that social stigma, because it’s so awkward to approach someone. What is the likelihood that you’re going to approach someone and offer to pay for their groceries? So she was a little caught off guard.
Miller: What did you say?
Lamoreaux: I just said, “I would like to pay for your groceries today. I’m just doing an act of kindness and if you would allow me to, I’d like to cover the cost.” And she asked why and what was the catch. And it was kind of in that moment that I realized like, “wow, this would be a lot easier if I could say I’m here with an organization or this is why I’m doing it.”
Miller: I’m not just some creepy stranger. I’m not taking pity on you.
Lamoreaux: I’m not just some creepy stranger, exactly. Right, right. And there’s so much going on with that recipient that you don’t know. They may not want to be approached. They may have social anxiety. There’s a lot going on. So again, being able to affiliate with an organization helps take some of that stigma away. But she was really receptive after she heard why I wanted to do it, and expressing to her “I’m not doing this for you, I’m doing this for me. I’m sober and this is something I do to keep me sober.”
Miller: How did you go from there to starting a nonprofit?
Lamoreaux: So we just started doing a lot of acts of kindness every week, handing out these care packages, paying for people’s groceries, handing out flowers. And so many people wanted to get involved. A lot of people were reaching out, a lot of people were offering to give funds and to donate, friends and family in that circle. People wanted to go out and do this. And I just started thinking there needs to be an actual organization, a foundation around this that allows a more structured way for people to get involved in this type of work.
At the time, I had applied to PSU for an MSW program. I was about to go to grad school to become a therapist, and prayed about it, made the decision that I’m going to defer the grad program, and I’m gonna get on Google and figure out how to start a nonprofit. And that’s what I did.
Miller: How do you decide who to help?
Lamoreaux: That’s a very interesting question. And I think the answer is very simple, that we help everyone and anyone that we see, aside from affiliations, anything. We’re really trying to bridge the gap that we just help everyone. I think that that is very unique. I have learned that being new in the nonprofit sector when you’re seeking funding and things like that, you really need to be able to justify who you’re helping and making sure that those resources are going to populations that can’t advocate for themselves, the populations that need support. Our organization was having a really hard time justifying that because we are just giving self-care boxes and flowers to anyone at random.
Miller: Not needs tested. The DNA of this, the whole idea is it’s random. It is just one human helping another regardless of where they are or what they need. And funders didn’t like that idea?
Lamoreaux: Correct, yeah. And I was really naive. I came into this nonprofit sector as a passion project, I want to give to people. I think the nonprofit sector is where I belong because my understanding is it’s an organization that wants to give back, do good and not want to make a profit. I’m like, this is what we’re doing, this is what our team is doing. I think that I was naive expecting that once we build the organization, the funding and the support will be there. And I learned so much in that first year of tracking your data, making sure that you have tangible data of who you’re serving, making sure that the impact is there. And it was really hard for our organization to justify that we were doing that.
So that was interesting. That was a lesson learned pretty early on.
Miller: The various examples that you gave – paying for someone’s groceries, giving them a self-care package, shampoo or something, or even a flower that has a note of encouragement – all of those are giving things or money to pay for things. What’s the connection for you between kindness and giving something, as opposed to giving time, giving a smile, giving something that’s not tangible in that way?
Lamoreaux: Totally. And we do both. We encourage all of our volunteers and ambassadors, if you don’t have the funds, if that is a barrier, holding the door for someone, smiling at someone – those are all acts of kindness. There’s just so much economic instability right now that that does have an impact. People need financial support, they need support with their groceries. That’s just what it is. People need that right now in today’s society.
Miller: Not too long ago, as I noted briefly in my introduction, you created a phone booth pop-up event that got national attention. How did it work?
Lamoreaux: So we built a phone booth as an art exhibit at the Portland Winter Light Festival this year. We asked people to step inside of the phone booth, pick up a phone and leave an anonymously kind message for a stranger who may be struggling.
Miller: I’m just thinking generationally, there must be plenty of people who went there who’d literally never been inside a phone booth.
Lamoreaux: Totally. Yeah, yeah. It was pretty self-explanatory. We had signage. The idea is that …
Miller: … Hey, Zoomers, this is how it works?
Lamoreaux: Yeah, yeah. [Laughter]
Miller: Let’s have a listen to one of the messages that someone named Carrie left.
Carrie [recording]: Hi, my name is Carrie. I want to remind you, don’t give up before the miracle happens. Things always get better. Nothing is forever. This too shall pass. I was 39 when I met the love of my life. I was 42 when I figured out what I want to be when I grow up. Just hold on. It gets better. I believe in you. Have a great day.
Miller: So Carrie left this message – and this is one of the ones that has sort of gone viral and gone national. Before it was picked up by the national news, who would have heard this? Carrie leaves this message. Who’s going to hear it?
Lamoreaux: So we collected all of the audios and we released them on our social media. We have a big following on social media, that’s how a lot of people find us. So we released it anonymously to the public. We have a 20-minute audio that we have put onto YouTube. You can download for free to listen to all of these affirmations. And we’re working on figuring out a way to get that 20 minute audio and offering it to hospice programs, to rehab programs, any program that just wants to offer their patients or their clients the opportunity to listen to positive affirmations from the voices of strangers in Portland.
Miller: Let’s hear one more.
Trans Daddy [recording]: Hi, I don’t know who’s going to hear this message, but I just want you to know that just by existing you are doing more good in this world than you can imagine. Don’t give up. It does get better and you’re enough no matter what is happening right now in the world. Trans Daddy loves you.
Miller: What have you heard about the impact that just simply hearing these messages has had on people?
Lamoreaux: Oh, I mean, it’s profound. The comment section under one of the videos where both of these audios are featured … it’s gone viral. It has almost 10.2 million views right now, 7,000-plus comments. They relate to the message from Carrie because I think it gives hope. So many people are relating to that they don’t have it figured out, that they feel lonely, they feel alone right now. I think a lot of people express that, and being able to hear that they’re not alone and other people are sharing in that experience is really important.
Miller: How are you at accepting help from strangers?
Lamoreaux: I’m getting better. This is helping me, going out and doing this. I’ve always been a giver. It’s really hard for me to receive things, and I think it’s hard for other people to receive things as well. I think our organization is pushing those barriers and helping people learn that it is OK to ask and receive help.
Miller: Kayla, thanks very much.
Lamoreaux: Yeah, thanks so much for having me.
Miller: Kayla Lamoreaux is the founder and executive director of the nonprofit Wildly Kind.
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